. This newsletter can also be viewed at: http://www.coachingforexcellence.biz/Newsletter.htm
Inside Out |
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March 18, 2008-- Volume 4, Issue 3 |
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A Message from Kim |
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Hi Everyone, If you are involved in any form of diversity initiatives at work, I would encourage you to seek out experiences with people you perceive as different from you. When you do, focus your attention on the things you have in common. Certainly discuss the differences but do so after you have established a foundation of similarities. The similarities will connect you at a human level while you explore the differences. When you do so, the differences will be explored from a place of curiosity, rather than righteousness. Make today the day you want it to be! |
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In This Issue |
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Feature Article Upcoming Events Book Review |
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Choice Theory® in Kenya In August 2007, I had the awesome opportunity to bring Choice Theory® to a unique group of people in Thika, Kenya. While there, I stayed with a local family and was pleased to live as an African for a week. I ate the foods, slept in their bed (which is nothing like the beds we have here), washed up without hot running water and rode the Mutatus (public transportation the equivalent of a 12-passenger van that they fit over 20 people in when busy). The only thing I didn’t do was drink the water. The people were wonderful. I don’t think I’ve ever had a group more interested in learning . . . they didn’t really care what it was, as long as it was information they could use. I was reminded about how great learning can be when it is fun and useful. I was so honored when the participants gave me the Swahili name of Mwalima or teacher. If you visit http://www.coachingforexcellence.biz/Africa.shtml, you can see the group playing, “This is a What” African-style and singing some native songs with great passion. This group had so much fun learning, they were amazing. The thing that’s so interesting about this is that on Monday when we started, the participants were accustomed to a typical education model—sitting at desks, eyes forward, taking notes and absolutely NO fun. They had no idea what they were in for as they entered the room and saw me with a felt chart on the floor, desks arranged in a circle, multiple koosh balls and colorful workbooks. The idea they could choose the color they liked was quite foreign to them. Their ability to throw koosh balls during class was unprecedented. We had 17 core people in the Basic Intensive Week in Reality Therapy and Choice Theory®. There were others who joined in when they were able but 17 partook in the entire week. The participants were very eclectic. There were men and women, some college students, a college professor, a counselor, a teacher, a pastor, missionaries, business owners, secretaries and others. Something that always surprises me about Choice Theory® is the universality across cultures. These participants understood and accepted the five basic needs and the fact that external control was ruining relationships. They became committed to implementing the Caring Relationship Habits in their lives. They were eager to try Reality Therapy as a self-evaluation process in their own lives and in the lives of those they influence. They learned to focus on the things over which they have control, as opposed to circumstances and other people they don’t control. Kenyans have a culture in which women are subservient to their husbands. It would have been easy for me to become righteous and talk about how that is wrong. However, once again Choice Theory® and trusting the process helped me. Who’s to say their way is wrong and my way is right? I can only know what is right for me. Explaining Choice Theory® within their cultural context was powerful, both for them and for me. We talked about wives still having a need for power and if husbands expected subjugation, then they would simultaneously want to be ensuring their wives had other responsible ways to get their power need met. This seemed to make sense both to the men and women in the group. Choice Theory® really does cut across all cultural groups. In the process of teaching them Choice Theory®, Reality Therapy, Lead Management and Quality School concepts, I learned so much. I learned about their culture. I learned to appreciate the wealth of material things I have available to me. I learned people can be very content and fulfilled even when they are economically disadvantaged. I learned there are some basic truths that connect all humanity. What was interesting to me is how happy these students seemed, despite their lack of material things. They did not complain about wanting more. They seemed content. Very few people had personal transportation and walked everywhere. It is not uncommon to walk four or more miles to go to the store. At first, I felt sorry about that, but then I thought about how they seemed much healthier. There was no obesity that I could see, so who is better off? We have convenience and material things. They had contentment and health. I wouldn’t trade my experience with the people of Thika for anything. The experience changed my life and I am hopeful one day I will be able to return.
Copyright © March 2008 Kim Olver. All rights reserved
NOTICE: This article is free and can be copied and reproduced |
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*Click Here to read some of Kim's other articles* |
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Teleconferences All teleconferences are free, one (1) hour in length and all you need is a telephone. When you register we will send you a phone number that you will call five minutes prior to the start of your teleconference. You will have the opportunity to ask questions, but if you prefer to just listen that’s all right too. You do not need a computer or Internet, only a telephone. Don’t delay. There are a limited number of slots available. The following Teleconferences are FREE Stress Management Feeling stressed? Is life getting to you? Then you need this teleconference. Learn how to de-stress with Choice Theory. Choice Theory states that all behavior is purposeful. Believe it or not, stress is a choice and you can choose not to be stressed! Learn how in this free teleconference. Goal Setting & Attainment Are you serious about attaining your goals next year? Do you want to do more than make a New Year's Resolution that you forget by the time the Super Bowl is on television? Join me on the free teleconference to learn my time-tested 7-Step process for Goal Attainment. We will do more than set goals--we will discuss a system to implement that will exponentially increase your opportunity for success. Also, my Goal Attainment System is multi-faceted. You won't just be focusing your attention on your career goals unless you want to. My system has you take a look at all areas of your life so you can accomplish an optimal work/life balance for you. There is nothing to lose but an hour of your time and so much to gain. Let's make this your best year yet! Time Management Protecting our time is important. We all have the same amount of time in a day. It’s what we do with it that is critical. Do you find yourself doing things you really don’t want to do or spending time with people who take more than they give? These are examples of not protecting your time. Your time is your gift to spend, as you will. You can spend it wisely or you can waste it. It’s your choice. However, one thing you can’t do is get it back to do over again. Learn how to manage and prioritize your time in a more efficient manner. Celebrate Diversity Do you maintain a diverse workforce in your place of business? Do you celebrate diversity? Would you like to learn how to create a diverse workplace that embraces diversity? Register for this call and learn how creating a diverse workforce in your place of business can increase your bottom line and create a more pleasant work environment for you, your co-workers and your employees. Choice Theory & Reality Therapy May 20, 2008 -- 8:45 - 9:45 p.m. EST This class will preview the revolutionary work of one of the greatest thinkers of our time, Dr. William Glasser. During the call, you will learn the basic tenants and concepts of Choice Theory, an explanation of human behavior; Reality Therapy, a process of self-reflection that encourages problem solution and self-growth; Lead Management, a democratic style of leadership that is not only effective in managing workers, but is also effective with the management of students in the classroom and for agencies working with non-voluntary clients; and Quality Schools, a new way of teaching and managing the classroom environment that creates trust, quality relationships, and improved test scores. Sign up today. De-escalation Skills Have you ever been involved in a situation with an angry person where you felt defeated? Either you escalate to their level of aggression or you allowed yourself to get lambasted and felt battered in the end? Either way, you lost by allowing the angry person to dictate your responses and control your effectiveness. Come learn some easy techniques to work with an angry individual to take their level of volitility down to a manageable level so you can intellectually process the problem with them. Empowered Leadership How would you like your leaders to be more effective? How would you like to create a work environment that is empowering to your employees? Register for this call and learn the skills necessary to create an empowered workforce for both management and your employees. Workshops Introduction to Choice Theory Stop believing that some degree of unhappiness is necessary in this life and that relationships are always difficult and tumultuous. It doesn’t have to be that way! You can be happy and satisfied in your relationships. All it takes is some adjustments in the things you are doing and the thoughts that dominate your life. Learn the concepts of Choice Theory® and see the difference it will make. Reality Therapy & Choice Theory The Basic Intensive Week in Choice Theory and Reality Therapy is a 4 day or 4½-day workshop where you will be exposed to some highly innovative ideas of Dr. William Glasser. You will learn the new psychology of personal freedom called Choice Theory. There is application in this workshop for teachers, school administrators, counselors, therapists, social workers, business managers, clergy, nurses, parents, and anyone interested in improving the quality of their life. You will learn how to empower yourself by distinguishing between those things you can control and those you can’t and focus your energy on those you can. There is practical advice about how to improve the important relationships in your life and how to become the person you want to be. This workshop helps you become more effective in counseling and teaching others, particularly those who may not even know they need your help—non-voluntary clients and less than enthusiastic students. The group size is kept small enough that you will receive individual attention and have plenty of time to have your questions answered. |
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Chat Room All Chats are from 7:30 - 8:30 p.m. EST |
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We could learn a lot from crayons: some are sharp, some are pretty, some are dull, some have weird names, and all are different colors . . . but they all exist very nicely in the same box. —Unknown I like this quote as it relates to diversity. I do not teach diversity in terms of differences between races. There is one race--the human race. All other variables are simply differences. Skin color is a difference, ethnicity is a difference, gender is a difference, sexual orientation is a difference, religion is a difference, family tradition represents differences, and so on. If we think of these variables as simply different, then there is no need to defend your position. All positions have equal validity . . .they are just different, as long as it doesn't hurt anyone. |
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Better Than Good: Creating a Life You Can't Wait to Live I just love Zig Ziglar! He speaks such inspirational concepts, you can't read him without wanting to live your life better. If you are looking for a feel good approach to living your best life, this book is it. Zig breaks it down into passion, performance and purpose. When you get those three variables aligned, you are living your life on purpose. Click here to purchase this book |
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| Go beyond your comfort level in your dealing with people this month. Approach someone you wouldn't ordinarily interact with from a spirit of finding a way to make his or her life a little better for a moment. It might be a kind comment to a toll booth worker or a harried restaurant server. You may hold the door open for someone and greet him or her with a smile and a kind word. You may be at a public gathering and notice someone who has no one to talk to and approach him or her for conversation. Reach out with the sole purpose of improving someone else's day. Do it for no reason or personal gain other than the good feeling you will get for helping someone else. | ||||||||||
Question: You know, I understand why you are always saying you like to spend time with people who are different from you. I want to do this but I am afraid I may inadvertently say something offensive so I end up saying nothing at all. |
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